The whole world seems to be shaken and stirred these days. I truly believe that as we are on the cusp of big changes that will be happening not just on the world stage (macro level) but for each individual (micro level).
So what could that personal big change be? What if 2020 is your year of perfect vision, where you have clarity and focus like never before? What if that clarity and focus was the foundation for an empowering new decade for you?
Here’s my challenge for you. I’ve got 3 things to get your 2020 vision on track:
(1) Think of something important that you want but has eluded you till now.
Something you want to be different in the next year and the coming decade – and that would really enhance your life:
- Improved relationship with your mother/ brother/ partner/ child
- Becoming healthy
- Feeling comfortable in your own skin
- Knowing your life purpose
- Being in a loving relationship
- Creating financial security
- Moving into a career that you love
(2) Imagine you in late 2020, and this thing no longer eludes you –
you either have it or you have clarity around the next steps to achieve it.
How do you feel?
Confident, relaxed, energized, happy, strong, loving?
How do you look? Is your body different? Are your clothes different? Do you carry yourself differently?
How is your life different because of that thing that has come into focus?
What do you know about that thing that you want to bring into being in 2020? E.g. what would an improved relationship with your mother look like? What expected impact on your life would there be to you knowing your life purpose?
Play around with this imagining and feeling into how you would love it to be in late 2020, if this thing no longer eluded you. You could journal about it or just let yourself daydream for a while.
(3) It is a journey to get there. What one step could you take towards that 2020 vision now?
Look with fresh eyes. Just because you didn’t achieve something in the past does not mean you can’t achieve it now. You are an evolving being and maybe this is the perfect time for this to finally fall into place for you!
10 or 15 years ago a friend of mine Conrad was giving up smoking, yet again. I’ll always remember his remark ‘one of these times it will be my final time’. And he hasn’t smoked since. Just because you didn’t succeed in the past, please don’t let that stop you going for that important change again now.
My sister struggled with her weight for 20 years. She tried many things over the years but none had a dramatic impact. About 2 years ago she lost over 5lb (32kg+)!! I’m so proud of her! She now loves the gym, eats well, still parties hard, and overflows with vitality and enthusiasm for life.
So have a real honest look at what stumped you in the past? How could that not trip you up again?
What support (professional or otherwise) could help you and stop that same issue sabotaging you again now?
E.g. if you want to lose weight would a personal trainer, a nutritionist or a weight loss coach provide the knowledge and support you need?
My sister loves her personal trainer and that wonderful relationship really kept her motivated. Now its how much better she feels physically and emotionally that keeps her motivated.
So who can be your supporter, who keeps you motivated and believing in yourself?
Would an accountability buddy help you to take consistent action?
As a transformational mentor, I love guiding and supporting people on empowering journeys. I connect you to your inner knowing so you are taking purposeful confident actions to create a powerful change.
However you embark on the journey to bring your 2020 vision into being, the 3 key components for you to keep in mind are support, knowledge and continuous action.
So in summary your challenge is:
- Chose one important thing
- Visualise how you want to be in relation to it in late 2020
- Get support, build knowledge, take ACTION
And make it an enjoyable journey to the next awesome version of you!!
If you have found this useful please share it.
Brene Brown says it best when she tells us that we can’t selectively numb. If you numb your difficult emotions you are also numbing your joy and gratitude. So often we don’t even realize that we are numbing. Those habits that help you ‘switch off’ from life’s pressures are often what’s numbing us.
When I became comfortably numb
When I was 26 I started living by myself for the first time, having always shared my abode with many people. I loved my home and painted it beautiful colours. But I felt extreme unease at being alone. I went out as much as I could, but I couldn’t go out every night. When I stayed in I turned on music and the tv to distract me. Solitude felt like loneliness and loneliness ached. Soon enough I started smoking joints in the evening, which I hadn’t been at all interested in before then. I’d roll up before the anguish set in. Inhale, ‘take the edge off’, and think ‘oh look even the adverts are interesting now’. It got the hook in me and became my avoidance technique of choice for a couple of years. It didn’t make me feel better. My mind felt groggy. I didn’t feel in control of my habit, it seemed to control me.
Ignoring something doesn’t change it; instead there is an increased sense of discomfort or pain.
Eventually I realized that the crutch that helped me to adjust to living alone, was actually preventing me from really enjoying my home and my life. So I threw the crutch away and faced the silence. The very thing that I was then avoiding – spending quiet alone time, connecting to my feelings and thinking deeply about my life – is actually something that now nourishes me immensely. Facing whatever you are avoiding can be a powerful up-leveler and can take you to places far greater than you can even imagine.
You’re numbing techniques might be so normal to you that you don’t even recognize them as an avoidance of anything. You know when you come home and pour yourself a big glass of wine – but you do that automatically most nights.
Or out of habit you pick up your phone to scroll through Facebook several times a day. Of course doing these things at times is no real harm – but our lives are meant to be ‘switched on’ and engaged so we are living a quality existence. It is always worth asking yourself if there are difficult emotion such as loneliness, or a dream for a bigger life that you don’t think is possible.
Maybe you’ve just been pushing too hard and are oscillating from stress to switch off. I’d recommend you check out my vlog Avoid burnout – flow with the low for guidance on getting back in balance.
Let’s address the smaller numbing habits. So what step can you take today to become more ‘switched on’ instead of ‘switched off’? Being engaged and present enhances the quality of any experience.
You could phone a friend instead of having a Whatsapp exchange? Real connection is invaluable.
Cook something from fresh ingredients instead of throwing something convenient in the oven.
Read or research something that inspires you?
Your shift might be limiting your social media time to particular slots in the day instead of them infiltrating every quiet moment.
What if you sense there is a bigger avoidance going on? The bigger the avoidance, the bigger the growth opportunity!! If want to proactively up-level is it time to work with a mentor to help facilitate meaningful change? What change would you love and what sort of mentor or teacher can help you get there?
I love to support people to move from self doubt to listening to their heart and what its calling them to do, feeling supported, confident and taking actions that inspire them. You can book a complimentary ‘discovery session’ with me here today to start the empowering journey. You’ll know after one session if it feels right for us to work together more.
Life is meant to be enjoyed. If you have slipped in to ‘comfortably numb’ then one decision and one action can switch you on and turn it all around. Enjoy!